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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/24644773">Bitter Nights</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/snicksnackfrickfrack245/pseuds/snicksnackfrickfrack245'>snicksnackfrickfrack245</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Twisted-Wonderland (Video Game)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Angst, Chapter 4 Spoilers, Gen, How Do I Tag This, I just want to see them happy, first fic ever, implied jamikali</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-06-10</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-06-10</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-04 02:29:37</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>684</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/24644773</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/snicksnackfrickfrack245/pseuds/snicksnackfrickfrack245</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Kalim has been having rough nights lately; he hasn't been sleeping well, not after what happened. Now that he knows what Jamil went through, he can't help but feel restless.<br/>Tonight would be another night where he'd think about Jamil, and wish that they'd be friends one day.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Kalim Al-Asim/Jamil Viper</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>7</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>145</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Bitter Nights</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>i have been spiralling down in my descent of TW hell<br/>but ever since chapter 4 i've been thinking that kalim shouldn't have forgiven jamil like that. i mean, he's nice but no one is ever *that* nice. anyway please enjoy this fic i wrote at 3am of kalim doubting himself.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The usually noisy Scarabia dorm was now quiet. Nothing could be heard, no one was awake. No one, except Kalim.</p><p>Ever since recent events, Kalim had been more conscious about his actions. He’d give Jamil affection, but he always made sure to back off when he thought necessary. Though it was subtle enough that the rest of the dorm didn’t notice, it sure wasn’t going past Jamil unnoticed. Kalim was pretty sure his “friend” noticed. If he did, then he’s not saying anything about it.</p><p> </p><p>But at this point, he should be grateful that Jamil even spent any time with him at all.</p><p>“Did… did I do something wrong? Was it… my fault?” the prefect mumbled to the silence of his room. “It has to be… After all, I ignored him all these years, thinking nothing was wrong… I shouldn’t have shut him out like that. How could I have been so self centred? I was raised surrounded by the generosity of other people, and yet I can’t even do anything to return any of their kindness! Do I really deserve this…?” </p><p>Lately, Kalim has had trouble falling asleep. Every time he tried, his mind would always think about Jamil. Whether they were good memories, bad memories, even the ones he barely remembered, his mind would always drift to him. </p><p>He remembers all the times Jamil would stay by his side at night, when Kalim was afraid of the dark. He remembers the times Jamil would help him study, and even though he didn’t quite get it, he still would explain the formulas to Kalim over and over. He remembers the times Jamil would play Mancala with him, making sure Kalim would always win. He even remembers the time Jamil got poisoned, but he doesn’t like to think about it much.</p><p> </p><p>Those were the days he let his mind wander. On the days he tried to fall asleep, he’d always be accompanied by the horrible nightmares of Jamil in overblot. Sometimes he’d be lost in the cold night of the desert, with the sound of crying ringing in his ears. Other times he’d dream of a life without Jamil. But the worst one by far, was a dream where he was trapped in his own Oasis Maker, slowly drowning in the cool water, helplessly trying to breathe. </p><p>In the end, it didn’t matter what kind of day he was having, they’d all lead back to the same conclusion: he missed Jamil.</p><p> </p><p>He missed Jamil’s cooking, his basketball games, even the slight scent of spices on him. Kalim missed everything about Jamil. He wanted to go to bed with Jamil by his side again, he wanted to walk to class with Jamil again, he wanted to play games with Jamil again.</p><p>Kalim knows he’d give anything in the world as long as he and Jamil could be together.</p><p>Even so, Kalim understands that the last thing Jamil would want to see is him. Kalim comprehends Jamil hates him, a bit too clearly. Kalim wishes that he never knew, and at the same time, he’s glad that he knows. The last thing he wants to do is make Jamil hate him further.</p><p>Kalim knows the truth now, and despite everything Jamil did to him, he can’t help but feel guilty. But feeling bad doesn’t change anything, he knows it. Kalim wants to find a way to make it up to Jamil. Kalim wants Jamil to forgive him, for things to go back to the way they were. </p><p>He knows it’s impossible, but he can dream, right? He laughs at the thought. </p><p>“How foolish of me.” Kalim mutters. He’s an idiot for thinking like that. If he was still the way he was at the start of the year, he would actually believe that. He could only hope that time would help improve the way things are now, if there was ever hope of the two being friends again. </p><p>Through the thoughts of Jamil clouding his head, a part of Kalim can’t help but wonder if, even for just a moment, Jamil had ever truly felt happy.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>thank you so much for taking the time to read this!! comments in general is always greatly appreciated! i wanted to express how i think kalim perceives everything. also, big thanks to my friend for helping me write this!</p><p>edit:<br/>come talk to me on <a href="https://twitter.com/RandomHello245">twitter</a>!</p></blockquote></div></div>
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